Butterflies fly away.

  Hello guys. Just a quick update for you readers. We're planning to go to the cemetary tomorrow, visiting my late grandma who passed away on the last day of school holiday. 20/6/2010. Al-fatihah. Nini Chuchu, You will forever be in our hearts and in everything we do and constantly in our mind. You are greatly missed.

 Bye.

xx
Mahyuddin

Mr Sour Puss.

The day didn't start so well for me today. I woke up at the wrong side of the bed this morning, I was uber bitchy and i literally bitched everybody. I was the biggest bitch i know. But i know that im not a bad person, im just a normal one, today i had a bad day. Period.

 On a more happier note, this afternoon we went bowling as usual and let me tell you this, i scored pretty good, 123 to be exact, i don't know if that's what you consider a good score but i think i did pretty well. I am currently in Kampung, sleepover as usual. And yes, Italy lost the game against Slovakia. Tough luck, i was rooting for them, heck my whole family was rooting for them. Well that's that.

I know at some point in my life i really wondered what does cloud tastes like.

Confessions.

Since i was a kid i was never a very self-conscious person, i live by my rules and i am very confident. Ironically,  I've never really known what confidence really is, the ability to speak in public? being able to be yourself and not afraid of showing it?. We all have our own ideas of what it is. I live a carefree life, or atleast i like to believe that i am. These are few of the things that i usually and constantly think about everyday and i think it's starting to affect my brain, lol.

But anyways, what i really want to talk about is my body. Like i mentioned before i was never self-conscious of myself and that includes my body, i was a skinny kid, scrawny kid and that doesn't bother me then i grew fatter surprisingly i took it in a positive way, i was getting hold of my body and i am very confident with what i have/had. I still remember this one girl said to me that i was fat, and i gladly replied "Yes i am and your dumb, im guessing it's genetics, send my regards to your mum" or somewhere along those lines. I use to say things as it is, i never really cared who'd be listening. I was what you would call 'a bitch'. Then when i was in form 2, puberty kicks in and i grew tall, and skinny. That made me a bigger bitch, but i wasn't those kind of bitches that you would usually see on tv, i don't provoke people im the type that would bust your balls if you provoke me. Yeah im that kind. Although i was a huge bully since i was a kid but that's another story. Along came form 5, by then i wasn't the kind that would walk through the rain and smile like a bitch, no, i became insecure. Yes what you read is correct and i guarantee you that it's me who wrote this. You might find it surprising unless you're really close to me then you know that such a thing as insecurity would ever hit me. Would it be appropriate if i say i was a good actor? Yeah that's how i hide it.

You know what got me through all this? Good friends, family support, a whole lot of tears and DVD's. Yes these are the things that made me who i am today, cheesy, i know. But hey this is my blog and i decide what's cheesy around here. lol. Frankly, without them i might just possibly be a bitter piece and i wouldn't wear colorful socks to school or carry around a ridiculous fluorescent orange bag. Yeah that's pretty much late. Wow it took me forever and an hour to write this. But i guess it's worth it.

xx
Mahyuddin

Hello guys!

I know i haven't been updating my blog for awhile eventhough i said in my previous post that i will. Rest assure that i am guilty. It's not that i've been busy or anything, it's just that i'm lazy. I wouldn't want to rant or anything like that in this post. Im just updating you guys on what happened to me this past few days.

On the 12th of June was the first day of the leadership course in PTE Meragang. I was fairly excited about it. It's a four day course, it ended at 4.30 on the 16th. It was organized by our fellow form sixers from Meragang, with the help from the Royal Brunei arm forces, RBAF for short and OGDC. I had heaps of fun with my friends along with my new friends from Meragang. The first day, let me tell you was tiring, we are trained like the soldiers are. We had to do drills and stuff like that but it was very enjoyable. The second day, our activities were organized by OGDC, tons of stuff happened. The games gets more interesting and the challenges are tougher, team building and such. I would probably lose you if i was to type longer than i should so i' just going to post pictures. Like they say, pictures worth a thousand words, whoever coined that is a genius in my book.

Sorry if the pictures unorganized, I need to finish my homework. Oh did i tell you that Meragang is a beautiful school. Well honey it is.

xx
Mahyuddin

Oh wow, apparently i forgot to sign out. Imagine the damage that will cause me. Today was fun, 3rd day in Dirah's place. We finally went out, well we went out the first night, anyway as i was saying, we all went to the mall this afternoon. It's fun i guess, it beats staying at home sitting on our asses. We didn't watch movies or anything like that, we just walked around eat stuff and went home at around 4-ish. Well yeah i guess that's it. Nothing more to blog about. So that's all it's a short update.

Oh wait, did i mention to you that i didn't come to the bowling alley this afternoon? Yeah it's decided i guess that im not attending. I hope their not mad. Sorry guys, tomorrow is my brotha from anotha motha and fatha's birthday okay that was lame, remind me next time that im not a gangsta. Anyways tomorrow is Halimin's birthday, i wish i can do something special, but im not sure how. I should've planned early and send him a gift via mail! hahahah that would be hilarious, what the hell Mahyuddin? This isn't the 16th century. okay i should stop making fun of the postal industry something something something.

So what should i do guys? I have few more hours until his birthday. I need ideas stat.

Should I?

Hello guys! currently at my cousins house. We're having a sleepover. it's all in the days worth. I had this sudden urge to just update my blog and this keyboard is just oh so fun to use. Maybe it's the sound it makes, and it sure is exciting to type with. It makes me feel like im working in an office or something. If your wondering, no im not using a laptop im using her pc. It's just beyond cool. Maybe i should stop raving about how great her keyboard is, it's not like im selling it or anything.

Moving to a more exciting story. Although exciting is a relative term. Anyways this Monday im going bowling with my friends and a special someone, well atleast i think she's special to me. It's going to be exciting, but im having doubts whether i should come or not. I mean the holidays just started im going to have tons more of this sleepover, but at the same time i can play bowling some other time or something. But im just so excited. What should i do? should i cancel on my friends and stay another night or should i go home this afternoon and well play bowling tomorrow. Or maybe i can go to the bowling alley straight from here. That sounds like a plan doesn't it? Oh shoot tough luck, i forgot to bring my wallet, i should have. Damnit! no wonder my instinct kept telling me to bring my wallet.

 Well then, we'll see what we can do. I hate to go home but i hate to cancel on her too. FYI i don't really hate going home it's just that sleeping over for one day is just, boring? plus it hasn't been one day. Atleast not until 5.30pm. What time is it anyways? maybe i should go. Bye now!

Sorry. I don't take leftovers.

Your probably wondering what happened to me since the last time i blogged. Today was awesome! I went to watch Prince of Persia with Limin! yeaaah bro! heart you man! it was fun.

Okay I'll talk to you about that maybe on my next post. Now i want to let this out. I guess the best way to express how I feel about this situation is by dumping it on this blog. Okay this is what happens. Frankly im feeling frisky tonight. So yeah, bear with me, im a total bitch! 

Anyways today as i mentioned i met my best buddy/brother so i told him what has been bugging me for quiet some time. He concluded that maybe being in form 6 made me weak. Why? well i use to not care what they say or do, i would usually pursue what i want and will not stop until i get it. So yeah basically im talking about this dude, he;s a douche, a big one. So yeah he likes this girl that i like, well guess what "Douche", you can have her, i don't give a shit about this situation. I don't take people's leftover, i know your kind, your the type of dude that hops from one relationship to another. Like i said before take your slut back, feast on it or whatever that is you do with girls. I will try my hardest to ignore this shit and walk through this storm, with the help of my family and friends. I have too much pride to change for someone who might not like me back.

Thanks Limin for the advice and making me realize who i really am. Your awesome mahn!